No matter what I used to do with my time, I’d never feel like I did enough. Anyone ever experience that?
And it was so silly because even if I had a specific LIST of what I wanted to ACCOMPLISH and lets say I did everything on that list, at the end of the day, I still had this nagging feeling of not doing enough, not being enough, not.. ENOUGH.
It’s interesting, where did that start? Are we taught this? Are some of us taught that? All of us? Did society do this? Does it stem from a deeply rooted belief that we AREN’T ENOUGH? That our core isn’t okay? That our decisions with HOW we spend our time isn’t quite right?
And even that, where did it start? Is it not trusting our intuition with what we need when we need it, and constantly feeling like we need to check in with others to see if
WE ARE OKAY,
IF WE ARE ENOUGH?
As you can probably see, I like to dig for the answers. I want to KNOW.
Anyway, I may never know THE ANSWER,
but I’m starting to just take the pressure off myself a bit more everyday, and I think part of that is because I’m embracing
Who. I. Am.
I realized, that regardless of my LIST, if I can spend more time in the moment, whatever that looks like to me, at the end of the day I feel more FULFILLED and less anxious about not ACCOMPLISHING ENOUGH.
Thank Gawd for that. Because what’s the point of life anyway? I’d like to think it’s to be happy and have peace and joy and play and growth, and truly be able to RELISH all of it, eat it with a spoon, gulp it down, with tears rolling down my cheeks,
FEEL ALL OF IT.
LIVE ALL OF IT.