Is This Even Legal?

Every morning at 4:30, I wake up, drag myself down the hall to this little makeshift meditation room I’ve created. It’s actually this small walk in closet in the extra bedroom full of all my books, old blankets, and lots of junk we don’t know what to do with. I do have an intention of fixing it up to feel a bit more,.. uh.. meditative. But for now it works.

After that, I go into the garage to start making some art. I’ve realized that for me, working in my art journal at this time is pure magic. I don’t need to think about what I’m creating, I just let my fingers move, my heart feel. Anyway, I was sitting out there this morning, totally enjoying the moment, and I suddenly got this fleeting thought.

‘Is this okay? I feel like I’m just playing, like I need to go and WORK.’

I’ve felt this way before. It doesn’t feel fair that I get so much joy from creating. I think that’s the very thought that prevented me from DOING IT for so long. I couldn’t stop thinking, ‘If I love it this much, it must be play, and I must be lazy.’

But what if that’s completely the opposite of what is true?

What if what we relish and devour with joy is actually WHAT WE ARE HERE TO DO?

Hmmm.

Anyway, this is what I was working on this morning. I like the idea of these interweaving mandalas,.. but maybe instead of black ink, I use a lot of different colors? Hmmm what do you think? I guess I can try a couple of different options. I’m going to cut a huge piece of my roll of 90 hot press watercolor paper for this.  I want it to be really big and exciting.