Return From Cuba

I just returned from a very long vacation to Cuba. It was informative and interesting and fascinating, and yet sometimes difficult.

We were on a small ship, and my hubby and I were the youngest ones. ahahh Most everyone was at least 70 yrs. old.

One of the things I witnessed about myself along the trip, was that I didn’t take as good of care of myself as I could have.

There were times when I:
went along with things I didn’t want to do,
kept my opinions to myself,
felt put upon and victimized.

Those were the difficult times.

I only got home a couple of days ago, and both my hubby and I unfortunately caught some horrible cold/flu on the ship so we have been in bed late Friday night. I can’t help wondering if our inability to check in with our desires, our need to go along with plans that we didn’t like, and our sometimes dis-empowered feelings contributed to our immune system being lowered enough to get this sick.

Or maybe it was just being stuck on a bus 3 days in a row for 9 hours each, with a bunch of sick humans. ahhah

Whatever it is, what I do know is that when we aren’t being fully ourselves, and not speaking our truth, listening to what WE NEED, life can feel harder than it needs to.

I meditated at home Saturday morning, and just sitting alone in quiet, I realized that I didn’t give myself any of that on the ship. There was a lot of going going going, but I didn’t carve out the space, the time. I didn’t make ME more important. In fact, I somehow fell to the bottom of the list.

It showed me how easily it is to slip away from feeling good. But if we just LISTEN to what’s going on inside, if we honor what we truly need, and speak our truth, suddenly things fall into place. Life feels easier, more enjoyable. I know I feel more sure of myself, more confident, more alive.

So it’s just another lesson, and I can start over any time I need.